Rage
by kaztsar
Summary: just a little something i wrote a couple of years ago--- tomented college nights...
1. Rage

RAGE  
  
Disclaimer: I own none of these characters  
  
  
  
Frustration caused him to put his hand through the cinderblock wall.  
  
"GODDAMNIT!!! Where is it now????  
  
A double fisted hammer strike demolishes his dorm room desk as if it was made out of Styrofoam. He picks up his fridge with one hand and casually tosses it out the window.  
  
"It's gotta be around here somewhere!!  
  
Another one handed casual toss causes the bed to flip over a couple of time. It took him along time for him to get over Akane, but this. this was much worse.  
  
Sure. Akane dumped him for that pig tailed pervert, he could deal with that. but. he lost his keys. he lost his life!! Everything was in that little ring! The keys to his dorm. the keys to his car.. in the car was his new GPS receiver, the only way he could get anywhere. without the GPS receiver, he won't make it to class. unless he makes it to class, he won't graduate, if he can't graduate he can't get a job, without a job he can't provide for that cute little frosh that he's been getting quite intimate with if he decides to pop the question but if he can't get a job or graduate or get to class what would be the point of graduating anyway, hell, what were the chances he'd even find her again!  
  
"PERFECT SHI SHI HAKODAN!!!!!  
  
The boy's dormitory is in ashes. and all because Ryoga Hibiki LOST HIS KEYS!!  
  
The end.  
  
KazBlah459@aol.com  
  
Author's notes: do I really need to explain my inspiration for this one? -- Kaz 


	2. Rage 2-- to those about to write....

Rage 2: to those about to write  
  
Disclaimer: nope, don't own Ranma ½ or any of it's characters, you want someone else  
  
Hi, it's me, you know, Ranma Saotome of the Saotome school of Anything Goes Martial Arts, I'm sure you know about me.. HEY!! I'm speaking to you, writers of fanfiction, I want to ask you a question.  
  
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO ME? Are you a bunch of sadists or something? You bring me up just to put me down? You think giving me godlike abilities will make up for screwing my live up more then Rumiko Takahashi ever did? My life is screwed up enough already and what do you do? You make my curse permenant, you make me were a goddamn fuku, or you change me into a c-c-c-c-ca-ca.. one of those things, or you make me a heartless warrior-you make me go through training that is worse then whatever pops would do. then again, he probably would if he had the brain power to think of it. I've died a thousand deaths, been through two thousand rebirths, I've loved and hated the same people and prosecuted by certain "gods," or at least people who'd like to think they were!  
  
Question: what did I ever do to deserve this? Huh? I try to be good. sure, I get the proverbial foot wedged up my mouth every now and again, I got more fiancées then anyone has a right to have, and a curse that changes me into a girl, half my friends want to kill me and the other half just wants me for my body. (they don't love me, they just love my doggy style!) Akane, well, she's an uncute violent tomboy who'd probably end up getting arrested for spousal abuse sooner or later. Shampoo, not as violent, but what's up with all that magic and drugs? Huh? Ukyo, gross, that's like marrying my brother or something. Kodashi? Well, she's just a psycho-hose beast that should be locked away in a padded cell. You think my father loves me? How does he love me, let me count the ways. 1) neko-ken 2) sells me for food as if I'm some kind of whore 3) uses my own honor against me. my own fucking honor he traps me into doing things that would break a lesser man, If you call that love, I want nothing to do with it. My mother?  
  
Hmph. my mother, she's worse, she abandoned me to be with that worthless pile of rhinoceros dung! Where was she when I needed her? Huh? Where was she when I cried myself to sleep when pops first took me and left home? Where was she when pops would beat me to close to death in the name of the "Art," huh? Where was she when pops threw me into a pit of starving cats with nothing but fish sausage as clothes? Where was she when I needed a mother's love? No, what I got was a seppuku contract that could clearly mean my death if ever we meet!  
  
And you, writers of fanfiction, you're even worse!! Being raped by Mr. Tendo or even Ryoga.eww. Ryoga? Don't even want to think about those! Or perhaps you think it's funny that I decide to become a girl permanently while saving the world in a short skirt while having lesbian affairs with the girl scouts in a bus full of nuns! Yes, having affairs with deamons is also on top of my list, it's right next to suddenly being transported to a different dimension to get the shit beat out of my by giant robots while singing "I want Candy" in a 15 years old body. Yes, that's always fun.  
  
Another question-if I was in a potentionally hazardous environment, do you think I'd announce to all that I was a martial artist?? I might as well where a red leather jacket with 3 white circles inside each other! Or a hat that says "over here!! I'm just waiting to die." I might as well announce a new national Japanese holiday-"pile on Ranma day" where every major as well as minor entity or martial artist just try to kick the shit out of me!  
  
Next time you decide to push me in a pit full of tigers. just think about it, what if someone pushed you in a pit full of tigers, see how much you would like it! 


End file.
